Would You Date Yourself?
by Jeffrey Hilton
It has become apparent and obvious that a lot of singles don’t want to date most of the other singles. Tragically each of those singles believe they are one of those few who are desired for dates. We all must look at ourselves and ask, “Would I date myself?”
Months ago at a ward prayer I attended some girls were asked to introduce themselves and the roommates who shared their apartment. Every week one guy’s apartment and one girl’s apartment would be asked to tell the ward about themselves. After introducing themselves the conductor of ward prayer would allow everyone to ask the presenters questions.
As with other weeks, the girl’s apartment was asked by the guys, “Which of you are single?” The girls would look at the ground and then each other. After a long silence the conductor would finally continue with ward prayer.
It seemed like a simple question to me. Why not answer it? As the ward prayer would continue I would always be reminded of the answer. If I were a girl I wouldn’t want these guys asking me out. The guys in the ward were painfully nerdy. They were load mouths and showed off. None of these girls really knew me so they were forced to assume I was like that as well.
One reason dates don’t happen anymore is because obnoxious guys are doing most of the asking. If a normal guy asks a girl on a date he has a lot of damage control to deal with. If we have anything in common with the guys they wish to avoid then we look like one of them.
None of us see the terrible impressions we are leaving on the opposite gender. Just because we are part of a singles ward doesn’t mean people want to date us. We all need to be careful about how we come across. There are a lot of singles and only a few who are making themselves desirable.
If we pay attention to our words and appearance we are more likely to be desired. Many of us are sabotaging not only ourselves but the rest of our gender as well. Some outrageous personality traits are actually personality flaws and should be saved for after someone has fallen in love with us.
We must not assume that people want to date us. Attracting people is a skill that takes effort and practice. If we happen to get a date we should evaluate what we did right and what we did wrong after the date is over.
Even animals have to compete for a mate. If we hold ourselves responsible for our lack of date we will realize we have control over our results. Try to figure out what you are doing wrong so you can fix it.
Those who are going on more dates than others are putting in more effort to attract the opposite sex. They are also learning from their mistakes and making the necessary changes to attract people. If something about you repels the opposite sex then change it.
©2008
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