TO DATE A STRANGER
by Jeffrey Hilton
I interviewed a former singles ward Bishop. I asked him what it was like being Bishop of a singles ward and he told me that dating has changed a lot since he was single.
I learned that in some cases going on a date can mean you are almost engaged.
On occasion I have asked girls on dates and they have told me they don’t know me well enough to go on a date with me. As this became more common I was forced to get to know girls for a long time before considering asking them on a date. Often I would be stuck in “the friends zone” by that time and the date would have no romantic potential.
A guy must consider if he knows a girl well enough or if he knows her too well before going on a first date with her. It used to be that a stranger would ask a girl on a date and get to know her by going on a date with her.
Most singles form a click of some kind and date within that group. They often will choose a spouse out of one of these clicks. It makes dating a very difficult process.
I try to meet many women from many different clicks but I look bad because I’m a stranger. If I find someone attractive, then I want to go on a date, but that would come across as asking a total stranger to have a relationship with me.
Since a lot of women will spend most of their time in a group it is hard to get their attention. Because it is hard to get their attention it is hard for them to get to know you and you to get to know them. Therefore you remain strangers and they don’t know you well enough to date them.
I used to go on dates with lots of different girls hoping to find out through dates which one I like the most. Now that process is difficult because I have to get to know all of them well enough so that they will accept a first date.
©2008
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